The perils of having a doula for a mama...

Maddie: "So, I was talking to my friend about planning a time to get together. I said, 'Oh, that weekend, my dad is going to be in Sedona for a drum circle and stuff and my mom is going to be teaching childbirth class.' And then there was this pause as we both looked at each other. And I said, 'Um, my parents are strange, aren't they?'"




Liam: "Mom, what kind of meat is that in the oven?  Bacon?  I think you're burning it."

Kat: "It's a placenta."

Liam: "Oh, well that explains it."




Playing a board game with the kids. Jackson pulls a card: "Name all of the planets."

Jackson: "Ummmm... Earf?"

John: "Earth, yes. Do you know any other planets?"

Jackson: "Ummmm... Uterus?"

Life lessons, Dude-style

Jackson: "I wost a bet to Bewwa, so I haf to pay da pwice."

Just a little punctuation confusion

Jackson: "Mama? What does 'period' mean?"

Kat [running through recent conversations in his presence to remember when she had mentioned anything remotely menstrual]: "In what context? Where did you hear the word used?" [thinking about the 5 year old explanation of women's cycles...]

Jackson: "You just said it! You say it to your phone all the time! 'dinner is in the oven period'"

Random Jackson-isms

Bleary-eyed Jackson comes stumbling down from upstairs and gives me a hug. He leans in and says dreamily, "I wuv you, my onwy mama. Fank you for giving birf to me."

Jackson: "Mama? Can you teach me a song on da you-ka-layle? But it has ta be da Easiest Song in da Worwd 'cause I can onwy pway A minor an' C."




Jackson comes into the bathroom while I'm getting ready.

Jackson [with a quiet desperation]: "maaaaama? my parfait is taunting me." Kat: "Um? How is your parfait taunting you?"
Jackson: "It wooks soooo dewicious, but I can't eat it 'cause it's for my wunch."




On the drive to school, I was listening to the same song for about the hundredth time.

Jackson: "Haven't we wistened to dis song a wot?"

Kat: "Yes. I'm trying to learn it so that I can sing it with Daddy. You want to sing Daddy's part?"

Jackson: "Ummmmm, no. It's a wittle too compwicated for me."

Kat: "Yeah, you're right. It is a complicated song."

Jackson: "And, some of de words he's singin', I don't even know about!"




Jackson: "Mama? Know why I'm so 'cited?"

Kat: "No, why are you so excited?"

Jackson: "I can't *wait* for winter! I'm gonna make a snowman!"

Kat: "Um, Jackson, this is the end of winter."

Jackson: "What!?! But, it din't snow! I din't go swedding! I wanna buiwd a igloo!" [wail]

The Dude doing his best Elvis Costello

Mood swings

The Dude has been a little moody lately.  Could be a growth spurt, could be immune system down, could be not enough sleep, could be too much Halloween candy.  Either way, he's like a time bomb the last few days.

Today, the horrible injustice the Universe bestowed upon him was: he didn't like his oatmeal with kefir in it.  He usually has it with milk and maple syrup and I suggested he try it with kefir this time.  He got it all set up, tried it, and cried.  I offered him solutions and he chose to try to rinse the kefir off of the oatmeal.  So, we got a strainer out, rinsed the bowl, spoon and oatmeal and put it all back together.

Kat: "Jackson, you know that what I'm doing right now is exceptional, right?  I'm taking time to help you fix the problem." 

Jackson: (moping) "Yes, mama.  I know dat."

He sits back down, we re-assemble the oatmeal the usual way and warm it up.  He sits down and begins eating in silence.

After a long pause, Jackson: "Thank you, mama.  I'm sowwy I yewwed."

I could see how you could get that.

Jackson: "I sink I know why dey call dis 'A-1 Sauce'."

John: "Why?"

Jackson: (pointing to the bottle) "'Cause it has an 'A' here and a '1" here.  And 'cause it's 'sauce'."



We were discussing a child Liam knows who has a bit of an attitude.

Liam: "Well, don't ask him if he's seen 'Snoop-Dog Millionaire'."

Kat: "Um.  Don't you mean 'Slumdog Millionaire'?"

I do not think it means what you think it means.

Kat: "Jackson, do you need to use the bathroom?"

Jackson: "Ummmmm, yeah.  But I need some books."

Kat: "Okay, would you like me to get you some books and meet you in the bathroom?"

Jackson: "Um, yeah.  I want the Frankenstein Bears books.  I think we have, like, six of 'em."

Well played, Bella. Well played.

Bella was taking pictures of John walking around in his underwear, getting changed after work. John caught her taking the picture.

John: "If you take pictures of me like that and send them to anybody, I will end you. You do not want to play the game of 'who can embarrass each other more' with me..."

Bella: (interrupting) "I'm not! I can't send it to anybody, anyway."

John: "...because I don't go to school and you do. It would be waaaay too easy to embarrass you."

Bella: "Well, you do go to work. And you're the boss."

Back to school

I took Jackson to his first day of preschool yesterday. I took him into his classroom and the assistant showed him where to put his things away. I got ready to leave and hugged him to say goodbye. As I pulled away from the hug, he whispered, "I have no idea what I'm supposed to do."



Despite the fact that I drive Jackson to the Montessori school that he attends, he wanted to walk to the bus stop where the other three kids get picked up every morning. So, he put his backpack on and walked to the end of our road. I came and picked him up and played "bus driver", asking him his name and how things were going. When we got back home, he asked me to let him off at the bus stop and he walked home.



Maddie was talking about applying to be on the Student Council.

Liam: "Student Council is really boring. All they do is talk about trying to improve the school and junk like that."

Random thoughts from random Hickeys

Yesterday was our day to pick up the CSA boxes at the farm. When we loaded the 18th watermelon into the car, The Dude exclaimed, "Mama! Where are we going to put all these watermelons in the house?!?!"



I was talking with Maddie over the weekend after attending a friend's blessingway. We were discussing how it can be difficult to be "different" in a world that values "sameness" and how to both fit in and still be your own individual self.


Kat: "The thing is: most people don't think about the world the way we do."


Maddie: "I think the thing is: most people don't think about the world."