Happy Birthday, Grandpa Hickey!

The Young and the Restless

Here are the questions Maddie asked at lunch today.

"Mom, can you have a baby when you're still in school?"
"When can I have a baby?"
"Do you have to be married to have a baby?"
"Did you have a lot of boyfriends?"

I don't like where any of this is going.

The two older kids were at our wedding, so obviously, they know that we had them first, then got married. We never had any intention of hiding that from them. I said that you can have a baby without being married, but it's harder.

Maddie: "But Aunt Jody did it?"

Liam: "Yeah, but it was hard. Do you know how long it took for her to find Uncle Kevin?"

Nontraditional parenting sure has its challenges.

Final word - Bella: "Does everyone have to have a baby? 'Cause I do not want to have one!"

Maybe letting kids watch their own births on video isn't such a bad idea after all.

Just Shoot Me!

Bella came home from school and sat down at the kitchen table for her snack. She asked questions with such urgency, she was almost out of breath.

Bella: "Did you guys get me shots when I was a baby?"

Kat: "No."

Bella: "Aw, man! Now I'm going to get the chicken pox!"

Kat: "Um.... What?"

Bella: "My friend at school has the chicken pox and her and her mom came in today to tell us about them. Her mom said not to worry, that I wouldn't get them if I got a shot when I was a baby. Now I'm going to get them."

She glared rather accusingly at me. Who knew. Most kids would be thrilled to be spared the endless poking.

I carefully braved the world of non-vaccination with the kids. I explained the two reasons why their dad and I decided not to vaccinate them. First, the shot doesn't always prevent the disease (ie. some kids who got the chicken pox shot will still get the chicken pox) and sometimes kids get sick from the shot. Maddie wanted to know more about that part. I told her about a friend they knew at their previous school who had a documented case of vaccine-induced autism.

I had to emphasize over and over (although I know it won't help) that we don't want to talk about this at school because we don't want to make any kids who got shots feel bad. I also emphasized that MOST kids who get shots are fine, but we didn't want to take that risk. Maddie asked why the doctors who give the shots don't tell people that they can cause problems. I told her that they don't believe it. And that the companies that make the shot do know, but don't want anyone else to know. And then my community activist daughter decided that the shot companies should go to jail. Look-out unjust world, here comes Maddie.